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| today marks the end of year 3 sem 1. was terribly sick yday and even got an mc for 205 in case. but my mind was intent to take the paper and get it over and done with. no more risk pls.
compared to previous sem, i felt terribly slack and unmotivated to study.
1. job is more impt
2. aft working so hard, i'd most prob end up with a mediocre job. no pt working
3. i believe i have enuff buffer to stay in 1st class
and so another sem is gone wasted. i say this is the worst sem since i'm faced with the most rejections in terms of job applications. from a highly motivated person, each rejection juz quietly stole away my motivation. im not motivated anymore. with big 4 interviews coming, i'm sure nx sem i'll be more happy. slacking and enjoying the last 4mth in sch with minimal worries.
i actually played on 30 nov as if i ended exams.. it was 306, the ultimate acct mod. lunch with tut grp, soccer, lan, bridge with the guys. the lan really reminded me of sec sch days where we go lan shop to play cs. been years since i last play cs on lan... though i missed those times i play at hall with edrei aft each paper to relax...
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| as the new sem begins, new challenges begin. of course literally, there's 205 - risk, 306 - risk analysis&reporting and 307 - derivatives & risk mgm. overloaded by risk? more to come.. but still on the same pg abt academics, together with co law, this muz be one of the, if not worst sem. i can foresee the intensity of workload and readings... and they are all tough modules.
to add on, there's all the networking sessions that are coming up. many of my evenings are gone and im not quite mentally prepared for networking as yet. im afraid... very afraid actually... the there but not quite there feeling.. and its happening all over again. i really wonder where i'd end up 1 yr from today. bank? consultancy? big4? others? no idea.
and to further pressurize myself, i've got sife stuff too. though i havent been really active, but now that im an 'executive' member, i prob shld spend some more effort on it. recruitment is coming and the managing of a club. and of course helping out in the projects
and of course im worrying abt my portfolio... im waiting for a gd time to enter the market but ive yet to have time to fully analyse the recent bullish trends.
to top all these of, i guess i'd juz not tink of any relationship stuff for this period of time. the time is wrong, and the resources are inadequate. ive prob miss the golden period of dating.
looking at the above, im feeling pressured. not too often i felt this way. essentially, time mgm will be v v v v impt. and i shall set aside goals that i hope i'd achieve.
1. min A for 306,307. A- for 208,205. - nov
2. feel a sense of belonging and execute sth for sife - dec
3. figure my career choice and be rdy for applications - oct
4. done with investment research - aug
with such datelines.. im hoping i can do it.
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| this summer flew by.. in a flash.. as i often say..
perhaps this time ard.. it really did. gd times are nv long enuff.
the ocbc internship was fun. i wld nv haf imagined the amt of activities and friends i'd make in 3mths. however, in terms of technical skills, it was way off my initial expectation of an internship. i know this wld put me in a big disadvantage for graduate opp but... i doubt i cld do much abt it. it'd have been perfect for a year 1 internship though.
my passive mode was tested time and again.. with the twists and turns.. but eventually.. i stayed true to my aims. it might have been a pity but... its a gd time for me to realise my strengths and weaknesses. in the end its still down to whether i wan to wait for a perfect one or make do with wad i haf. looking at my resources available, i knew im no match... till i become stronger and powerful.
and i visited the last surviving kampong in sg... at buangkok. it fell short of my expectations.. cars, public water, garbage bin, telephone. the only reason why its a kampong is due to its surrounding... of trees and animals running ard. other than that, it looks like some pte housing in a jungle?
and tmr marks the start of a new semester... i wonder wads ahead.. networking sessions.. sife proj.. coursework.. new friends? my true wish is to secure a front office job in a bank.
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| this's my 1st time watching a concert and its quite interesting
the stage design was unique and many props were used for entrance and exit.
and probably the best thing is to hear a melody of songs for 3h. at least ive heard of all her songs... though im not a big fan.
im glad i made someone happy todae but my dilemma juz deepens. how? im torn. confused.
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| this muz be one of the wkend in many yrs that i felt 'if only i can split myself up'.
so many events and i know i cant possibly go all. decisions are tough but they've to be done. and so i went for the dept chalet @ safra country club.. somwhere at changi. food was great but there wasnt much activity. head off to sentosa for clar's bday.
what was looking like a boring one turned fun with the discovery of 2 other 'outcasts' and jevon's sis who looked really bored. frisbee at the beach at nite? but it's cool to hold a mini beach party.. juz that i was hoping for more action..
the 2nd unofficial intern outing was as expected. many pansehed. and last min too! in the end there was only 6 of us... tingting, huimin, wei hong, norman, chiang meng and myself. but it was fun. i tot i picked up vball fast.. perhaps cos i was playing with the pros so the game looks more interesting. the rain was inappropriate but we ended up doing all the rubbish stuff and throwing pple into sea. orientation? haha.
rushed off to meet the tut grp for juncheng's farewell. im glad i made it since now i wont be able to see him off in person. yong tau foo and indian fd. and with some window shopping at mustafa. amusing ourselves with toys.
leg is in terrible state. cant walk early morning and cant go anywhere. parents got a tie da friend to check on my leg and it's getting better now. accordingly, one of my toe bone went out of position but he pushed it back. the muscles however was badly injured.
i rem how i got injured. jumping for the vball, someone landed right on my feet. it hurted but i shrugged off the pain till i became quite bad when i reached home. but things went worse this morning. oh wells.. im hoping i can start walking normally soon
and the vball session actually got me desiring such a lifestyle. is that wad i want? it seems so. i enjoy sports than to shop, com, book or do nth. ive been desiring that.. am i going to change.. i dunno.. time is running short.. and of course tt appears to be the most suitable... | | |
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